Have you ever said to yourself, “You know what? I’ve just got to get out of here, get away from all this, and do something different. I need to move!”?
In preparing for my summer travels, I said exactly that. Although I wasn’t planning a permanent move, only a vacation, I still felt that need to get away from the normalcy of my life and do something different. I just needed some kind of change. Little did I know what that change would really mean. read more
Since the beginning of June, I’ve spent only eleven days at home. I spent two weeks in New York and Boston, a week in Chicago, and now, although I’m “home” in Atlanta, I’m house and dog-sitting for some friends. (And I’m preparing to head to Haiti in 10 days.) While this is a most unusual schedule for me, I’ve thoroughly enjoyed it. Over this time away from home I’ve learned quite a few things, but one sticks out more than the others. read more
You may (or may not) have noticed that I’ve been much less active on Twitter and Facebook this past week. And I definitely didn’t write a blog. Why’s that you ask? For one, I’ve been on a bit of a vacation — a much overdue vacation at that. Two, I’ve got so much on my mind that I really don’t know how to consolidate it down into one post. But I’ll work on it. read more
[tweetmeme] Burst couldn’t be a more appropriate word. I hung up the phone and burst into tears. Like a water balloon too full, tears spilled out of my eyes, down my cheeks and chin, and landed on the table below. My ears heard the words, they understood the sentences they formed, but my mind wouldn’t let me process or comprehend what I had just heard. I couldn’t fathom why a person would do such a thing.
The other night, after having a great brunch with a friend, and doing some homework, I got a little overwhelmed with life, even to the point of becoming a tad depressed. Then I talked to my dad. Both of them. My dad called me on the phone and we had a wonderful conversation just about all that’s going on in both our lives. It was nice to know that we were struggling with some of the same things. We were open, honest, and vulnerable about our lives. And it felt great.
Then we prayed and talked to our Heavenly Father. It was just what we both needed. I don’t know about him, but I was crying so hard by the time we finished — I mean that ugly cry too — that I couldn’t even breathe out of my nose. But I felt so much better. Like a weight had been lifted off my shoulder. There was little doubt in my mind that my Twitter family needed to hear what I had just received. Below is what I shared. (If you’d like the high-res photo, click here)
And because this is Twitter, you’ll have to read from the bottom up, unless someone would like to take the time to reverse all the tweets.
Today I don’t really have anything too deep or insightful or controversial. I just wanted to write a little bit about what I feel like God has been doing in my life. This is more of a journal entry than you’ve seen me do in a while, perhaps. Just as a heads up: I’m going to be intentionally vague about specific names because I don’t think that they necessarily add anything to the story.
I guess I have some uncertainty, as we all do from time to time, or perhaps more often than periodically, about what exactly it is that God’s doing. I feel like He’s behind the scenes, moving things around, getting some stuff ready, but for what, I don’t know yet. I feel like there have been several statement that people have made, several hints that really struck a chord. You ever had a few completely random people mention the same thing to you at completely different times? That’s happened a few times lately. It’s very interesting because what they’re mentioning wasn’t really something I thought I would be doing, but I can see how God could use that as a part of my calling. read more
This is not going to be pretty, well thought out, eloquent post. This is going to be a messy post. I’m just gonna talk to God and be entirely honest about where I am right now. I don’t expect your comments or applause. I just need to talk to God about my life. I thought you might be able to gain something by listening in so… Enjoy your eavesdropping.
God… I’m sorry. I haven’t depended on you. Especially not for the things I truly needed. I thought I could do it on my own. I feel like less of a man when I have to admit I need your help. But I do. God I need your help. I can’t do this thing called life by myself. As much as I want to say I did it, I know you are worthy of any shred of attention I could garner by myself. You alone are the reason I’m alive today, with a story to tell and a means by which to tell it!
Jesus, don’t let me be drawn my the applause and approval of men. Let me not entertain them & their frivolity. I want you to be pleased with me. I want to hear you say, “Well done.” Let me not play and cater to their ever changing whims. They will only take me further off course! Let me direct all praise back to You, for I have nothing in and of myself! You give me everything. read more
I realize I have done some things I should not have. I owe you an apology. Somehow, Maxwell’s “Pretty Wings” seems incredibly appropriate for right now.
Time will bring the real end of our trial. One day there’ll be no remnants, no trace no residual feelings within ya. One day you won’t remember me.
Your face will be the reason I smile, but I will not see what I cannot have forever. I’ll always love ya; I hope you feel the same
Although he said it well, I could never let another man speak for me completely.
I played with your emotions. I knew what I was doing. I’m sorry. I just didn’t know the extent to which you were really feeling me. I knew you liked me. And I liked you. We had chemistry. I got caught up. My intent was not to lead you on or to hurt you, regardless of how you perceived it. I don’t want to hurt anyone, much less those close to me. read more
Watching Michael Jackson’s memorial today really hit me hard. I wrote a post about him & his legacy last week, but what hit me today was his humanity. He was a son. A brother. A father. A friend.
I’m normally a fairly composed person, even when sadness and mourning is all around. I’ve normally “walked through” what could go on in my mind. I’ve thought about how I would respond before things happen.
I was prepared for the speakers. I thought I was prepared for the musicians. What I wasn’t prepared for was the 11 year old girl. For the first time in her life, Paris Katherine Jackson took the microphone. She spoke 30 of the shortest and most basic words in the English language. They were words that made the world stop. And weep with her and perhaps for her.
“I just wanted to say, ever since I was born, Daddy has been the best father you could ever imagine. And I just wanted to say I love him so much.”
I wept. Tears streaming down my face, trying to catch my breath. read more
I was watching “Inside the Actor’s Studio” today and heard something that really sparked my interest. The host, James Lipton, was being interviews by Dave Chappelle and he was talking about different people who had influence him and his craft.
He told a story about ocean liners in the early 1900s. When the ocean would get a little rocky, and the boat moved back and forth more than normal, they would set a rope around the border of the deck. The idea was that, if you were walking on the deck, and you lost your balance or fell over, you could grab onto the rope, regain your balance, and continue heading in your original direction.
It got me thinking, “What is the rope in my life?” What is that thing that, when I lose focus or balance or get thrown off course, I can grab onto to help me straighten out? Do I even have something like that? Is it a person I lean on most? Is it a thing, something of material value? Or is it something greater than that? Something eternal perhaps? Something that won’t change regardless or how much I do.
For me, I have my guide rope in the fact that I know what my purpose is. I look at the fact that God has created me for a specific mission and a unique purpose that only I can fulfill. That’s me… But what’s your rope?
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